When you are constantly sleepy yet conscious of your surroundings things tend to seem a little gray. It is like a mist, covering the true colors of that which should grace our eyes. Sadly enough, in all true reality we as a whole do not appreciate all the colors of life.
I was once told to absorb all life has with your five senses. To see life, to feel it, to savor it, listen to it, and to even smell it's mere essence. How though, is it possible when we all try to mold life as we want it and not as it really is? We chose to accept what life shows and throw away what we consider not ok. Imagine now how I perceive life! I can't embrace all of it because of my insomnia. We all have a biased opinion of life. So, then how do you define life? Obviously, everyone has their own definition. Yet, when was the last time you took a pause to consider such thing? When was the last time you looked around you and actually pondered how life is to you?
Sunday, November 18, 2012
It is funny how we all have some sort of plan every day when we wake up. We try to map our day, moves, actions, and words. In all reality...we want to have control at some point. What happens when reality becomes more of a dream? Ok, sure this sounds like some sort of Inception type of idea but...lets be honest. Who hasn't thought of it?
Personally, I have a huge insomnia issue and no I highly doubt the fact that college is a factor in it. Although, this is how I perceive life on a day to day with my "reality insomnia." Time in my mind goes insanely fast. It overwhelms me how fast it travels. Time seems to work against me instead of with me. People seem and act so robotic. Its like everyone has predetermined everything in their mind, emotion, and physical being what is meant to be done. Its like standing in a crowd, and you are the only individual who seems to perceive everything. The heat the mass is creating, the mix of smells, the increasing noise people make.
I want to reach out to those individuals out there who seem to be in my same position. That place where you question yourself, others, actions, thoughts, ideas, places, etc...
I've been told that asking questions is a virtue, yet its a virtue that has gotten individuals in trouble. My real question is. If the purpose of a question is to receive an answer. Then why are we afraid of verbalizing, or writing that which we don't know?
Just a thought...How do you, as your unique self; formulate a question or doubt in your mind? What triggers it?